These are all 'Shiny Opus People'

This was a piece I wrote about a year ago for an e-newsletter we were thinking of starting then. The idea never took off but my thoughts did… as you will see. Most of what I’ve said applies even to date but there are some factual anachronisms which I hope you will forgive me for. I don’t feel like modifying them. Just look at it as ‘A look at Opus one year ago’.

Shiva ‘Sweaty’ Subramanian: Called Shiva by some but ‘beast-man’ by most, these two names should give you a picture of the man. Most often found at Opus in Sweat pants or his Kaftaan; he calls it his Martial Arts outfit but I don’t believe it - I think he like to cross dress once in a while. And oh, since he’s going to kill me when he reads this, you’re all invited for my funeral.

Shonali ‘Sashay’ Mathias: Yup yup yup!!! You got it. The sway on the lady as she walks around trying to get the Karaoke system to work…or trying to remember a table no…!! Whooooo boy! And the SMS’s she’s been known to send; guys watch out if she has your number!!! Most often seen around in Opus with a Camera and a frown… This is one bit I just had to add – Shonali is our Resident Hottie. Excellent at public relations!!!

Neil ‘Neat as a Pin’ Campos: Nothing fits Neil better than that phrase. Never a hair out of place, shoes to rival Jayalalithaaa’s wardrobe… Neil, if he was taller, would be excellent model material. But having fallen short, he can be found at Opus in Casuals, which in contrast to mine…are smart!!! If you think I’m being nice to him, I have my reasons…

Gina ‘General’ Braganza: Ooooooh boy, run for cover. Not called general for nothing, Gina’s alarming and extraordinary behaviour has also earned her the nick name of ‘Hitler’… The woman responsible for many things including tying down her husband’s considerably vast bulk to land and so on and so forth, Gina’s trademark is the beret she wears on her head. A word of warning, she may look French but don’t try and slap her…?

Carlton ‘Uh…uh…uh’ Braganza: The man responsible for the frown on Shonali’s face and the one of the vast bulk, Carlton is what youngsters call a ‘dude’ and what oldies call ‘strange’. Found at Opus in any item of clothing you can think of and a lot you can’t or wouldn’t want to, Carlton’s dress sense is best left to the experts. Incidentally the ‘Uh…uh…uh’ is something he grunts on the mike to any song when he doesn’t know the lyrics. It has now been enhanced by a startling ‘Wooooooaaah’ in the middle of a performance.

And now for the fun part; the next few are new. Think of it along the lines of Star Wars: The prequel and the sequel. The sequel focuses on the people at Kroaknight. The various weirdos and their idiosyncrasies.

Mark ‘Midnight Special’ Swaroop: He’s been around for as long as we can remember and has even handled some of our kroaknights when Carlton and I have been out of town. He is forever thankful for the blackboard we have at Opus cause that’s his favourite hiding place. At Opus, with its dim lighting and all, Mark somehow reminds me of the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland. I’m not sure why… But all jokes aside, Marks falsetto version of ‘Barbie Girl’ is possibly one of the best I’ve ever heard. But only when he sings it with me.

Namrata ‘Not now ya…’ Sudhindra: probably the most well known dentist at Opus; maybe the only dentist at Opus, Namrata is another die hard but she just loves playing hard to get. With her two friends, Squeaky and Nins, she could be the next generation of Itchy and Scratchy. They even sound like a cartoon strip – Squeaky, Nins and Nam-Nam.

Kartik ‘KarpeKundi’ Iyer: Only his wife Preetha can testify as to the veracity of my nickname for him but I like it. Kartik or Higher Iyer as he likes to be called is one of the ‘Stars’ at Opus. The quintessential funny man with a few Stand up comedies to his credit, Kartik, unfortunately is like one of those really old scooters – Lambrettas I think they’re called – needs to be kickstarted at least 20 times before he can rev into action. Preetha, tweak his ‘g’ears a little will you?

Pramod ‘Passionate’ Nanjappa: I have never met a more passionate man in my life. He is passionate about everything - mainly beer and Zombie – but there is not one thing you can talk about that will not incite Pramod into a bewildering flurry of action and dialogue. And when you’re well over 6 ft tall, with a bald head and a Superman T-shirt, people tend to listen or get out of the way really quickly.

The views and opinions in this piece are solely those of the Restaurant and do not in any way reflect upon the authors’ sentiments.

Vivek Madan